I haven’t been posting much lately. I have a bunch of excuses, but my main one is that my cousin, Pepe Bolorinos, was the victim of a hit and run in San Francisco last week.

He’s alive. Still in ICU at SFGH, but alive. The driver is at large.

I’m so angry. And sad. And hopeful, all at the same time. Many of the people who know Pepe are, justifiably, furious at the driver, who has yet to come forward. But I’m not.

I’m scared to write this post. I’m not sure how much I’m willing to share, but where else would I do this?

I’m not furious because I’ve hit a pedestrian before, too.

Now, granted, I didn’t drive away. I actually got out of my car and fell to my knees and started crying.

My thoughts? Something along the lines of – How did this happen? Do I get a redo? Why did this happen to me? I’ve never had a ticket or committed a traffic violation or even been pulled over. But I hit someone.

But, the young man in my situation admitted to seeing me coming, and decided to cross illegally anyway. Luckily, I was only doing 25 MPH and he was ok. A few broken bones, but ok.

And yelling at me as he was loaded into the ambulance.

I hope all the time that he won’t run into traffic again. Use the crosswalk, man. Please, please, please.

Pepe, on the other hand, is facing terrible brain injuries in addition to broken bones. He’s been in the ICU for a week and just awoke today. He’s an incredibly intelligent human – he speaks 3 languages beautifully, plays and writes music, graduated from UC Berkley with honors.

Used to argue with me about whether or not black and white are colors 😉

And now, we’re all on pins and needles, hoping he’ll just be ok. And there’s not much to be done to help but create awareness.

I know how terrifying it is to hit someone. It’s an out-of-body experience. I’m still messed up about it. I think about it almost every day.

Then again, I have to drive down the street it happened on every day, because it’s in my neighborhood. And I have had multiple people walk|run|bike out in front of my car since. A kid jumped out in front of my car Friday while messing around with his friends on his way home from the local high school. I dodged him and I almost called the cops on him – it’s reckless and stupid to test the limits like that!

Then again, there are so many people who drive too fast, who aren’t paying attention 100%, who are reckless and dangerous on the road. If you text and drive – stop it. Now. You really don’t want to have to go through the aftermath of hitting someone. It’s scarring.

I didn’t drive for weeks after it happened. I was so, so petrified. I felt like a hazard. Eventually, I had to get over it and move on. Buck up and simply decide to be as vigilant as possible – all the time. Now, if there’s even a distraction on the side of the road, I don’t look. I keep my eyes on the road. Like, glued to it. I know this is a no-brainer, but I use the speaker-phone option for anything and everything when driving, or pull over if I need to look for directions. Siri is a big help. I always wear my seat belt. I scan every intersection for j-walkers.

It’s all common sense stuff. But, once you’ve been in this situation, you’ll never take it for granted again.

And I used to enjoy driving.

So, I guess all that’s to say that I can almost understand why someone would be too frightened to stop if they realized they hit a person. But, it’s the right thing to do on a very basic level of human morals. We can’t run (or drive) away from our mistakes. There’s no way to avoid the guilt you’ll feel afterward – even if (like in my case) the pedestrian is legally responsible for the accident.

So to the driver who hit my cousin, Pepe, and fled: running won’t make you feel less guilty. And you can’t avoid the consequences of your actions forever. Come forward and take responsibility.

You and I, we both live in 2 of the most dangerous areas for pedestrians in all of California. And by not coming forward, you’re setting a standard for all other drivers in San Francisco. You’re letting people believe that they can go without getting caught. And that if you can hide, it’s more socially acceptable for them to do so as well.

I love my cousin. My family had dinner with him the Saturday before you hit him. I excused myself to take a phone call and didn’t get to say goodbye before he left. He’s such a talented and well-loved guy. He has a great family and community. We miss him.

I saw him in the hospital a day after the accident. He looked so small and I knew then how serious his injuries were. And how costly his recovery would be.

I’m not saying I want you to go to prison or whatever. It’s not for me to decide. Just come forward.

Let the rest be in the hands of God.

So…it’s been interesting around here for the past week or two.

Wanna see what’s up?

That is on the other side of my front door. And to the right:

Mainly the contents of the guest room. And I was just starting to feel good about how it was looking…isn’t that how this whole decorating thing works? 😉 If you follow me on Instagram, you know I’ve been working on it for a while. Here’s a little example:

I had repainted the furniture and figured out which color to use on the walls (Indulgent Mocha from Behr’s my go to neutral). Then, I ordered roller shades (the same one that are in the dining room [period appropriate, they protect the hardwood by keeping all the light out and they’re cheap!) from JCPenny.

But the stuff really hit the fan when we had some people over for dinner and were showing them around. You know, giving them the tour 😉 One of our friends suggested pulling up a corner of the carpet to see if the hardwood in the entryway and dining room continued into the other rooms original to the home.

So we did. And it does!

Don’t get me wrong, I’m thrilled. I hate carpet. I love hardwood. But. The problem with the hardwood in the guest room…is it’s painted. Brown with nice white speckles all the way around. And, I don’t know when it was painted or with what exactly…which makes me nervous. Please, please don’t be toxic…

Ugh.

Now. I know it can be fixed. But that’s expensive and we can’t make it happen right away. So what would’ve possessed me to pull up the carpet?

Glad you asked – I didn’t! This was JBoat’s doing 😉 A little late-night hang out with a friend and suddenly, all the furniture’s out and the carpet’s up and the room’s kinda-painted.

Yay, paint!

So, I’m looking at the bright side. This means I can get an estimate from some local guys who would be up to the task of refinishing all this hardwood. It also means the light fixture we got for Christmas last year has been installed. The ceiling’s been painted (Swiss Coffee) and the walls are almost done. It means the carpet is gone. And we didn’t even have to take it to the dump – a friend wanted to repurpose it!

I’m hoping to get as much of the brown paint (and all the white stuff) off the floor as possible. Then, I’ll use Murphy’s Oil Soap to get it really clean. Maybe get a rug or something…it’s a great excuse for a new rug. I like this one best:

Nate Berkus Diamond Jute Area Rug

And, I painted and rehung the door – I’ll post a tutorial. True progress, guys.

Sorry for the shabby iPhone photos.

So, this could be a win-win situation. I guess we’ll see how things play out!

So, I feel like such an idiot sometimes.

Like, regularly.

I’m guessing you, too, have been interacting with lots of different people who all communicate. And I seem to have a really hard time communicating effectively with them all.

As the saying goes, “The world would be a boring place if we were all the same.”

But would it? Because I’m starting to think it would be so. Much. Easier.

Not less exciting. I’m sure it would be kinda boring. But less frustrating and discouraging.

I know, idiot idea, right?

Nowadays, the world runs on text-based communication. Emails, text messages, blog posts 😉 And we’ve all heard the statistics about how much less we communicate with others verbally than any generation before us. And I’m thinking, “Ya, that’s cool; that isn’t necessarily a bad thing.”

(Source)

Wrong.

It is a bad thing. Because over text, it is so much easier to interpret messages as mean, negative, degrading, etc.

And I’m always thinking to myself, “Surely they don’t mean it like that…do they?”

Because I wouldn’t mean it that way. I was raised to say please and thank you. Yes, ma’am and no sir. To be polite and to put effort and thought into how someone on the other end might interpret my words.

But, not everyone else does.

And this is were I wish we were all the same.

I’ve heard all the stuff about how it’s the receiver’s fault for how they understand the relayed message. And I couldn’t disagree more. Communication is a two-way street! And the deliverer has to take some responsibility for how his or her message is interpreted.

So imagine, before typing an email or sending out that tweet, if everyone were to really considered how their words will be received.

What a wonderful world it could be 🙂

So if you’re a Song of Fire and Ice fan, you know the Starks have this thing about winter.

Well, I’ve got a thing for fall <3 Cozy clothes, awesome candles, thick blankets, delicious food...oh, and the usual falling leaves and pumpkins and stuff 😉 But, like I mentioned, fall foods are some of my favs. Pie and comfort foods and citrus...and I can use my oven again! Here are 2 recipes I've tried so far that I'm loving for fall: Tomato basil chicken – While summer’s tomatoes may be coming to a end, utilizing them for this recipe won’t disappoint! In fact, I can’t wait to make this again, butter and all 😉

Quinoa chicken chili – This is so hearty and delicious. I’d recommend using a packet of taco seasoning in place or the recommended spices – the quinoa seems to soak in and then somehow eliminate the kick originally provided by the red pepper flakes. This is cooked entirely in a crockpot 😮 and thickens up nicely overnight in the fridge. Top with cheese, Greek yogurt and avocado for something extra special!

Btw, I used Trader Joe’s frozen, all natural, nothing added, yada yada chicken tenders in place of chicken breasts in both recipes 🙂 works just fine, is cheaper and helps avoid protein overloading!

Another BTW – have you seen this going around online?

source

How rude. Seriously. Ladies, do our husbands (well, hopefully all our husbands) not help support our families? Carry much, if not all, of the financial responsibility? Mow the lawn, take care of the trash, deal with the car maintenance stuff? Handy-man tasks too complicated/taxing/dangerous for us fragile damsels?
Aka, everything we don’t want to do?
Sure, I won’t deny that my husband pretends to not know how to do the laundry 😛 but I also can’t deny how much he does for me every day.
Bottom line: a married couple is like a team – supporting, encouraging and sharpening one another. So let’s not disrespect our men by equating them with children. Let’s instead acknowledge all they do for us when we’re frustrated by the upright toilet seat again 😉

Much love.