“Discretion will protect you, and understanding will guard you.”
I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately. About this idea we have as Americans that we can be anything if we out our minds to it.
We tell our kids this.
It’s further ingrained in them by the education system.
This idea motivates many to continue on to college or vocational school.
But then, when they join the work force and are stuck in an entry-level position, they’re confused. And frustrated. And aren’t sure how they’ll afford to pay off their student loans.
I think we’re living in a broken system. Where people feel entitled to certain achievements they haven’t necessarily worked for.
But I don’t think it’s the people’s fault. I think the fault lies with the idea they’ve been fed since they were young.
“You can be anything you wanna be.”
I get where this idea comes from. It’s the summary of the American dream. Instead of being stuck in the same situation for your whole life, you can work your way out of it and make a better future for yourself.
The problem is – the key word there is work.
You don’t get a high paying job because you went to college. You can’t expect to be given much before you’ve given at all. You have to earn your way.
Most of us Americans come from immigrant roots. We’ve all heard the stories, “My grandfather came here with fifty cents in his pocket,” etc. Do you think someone told him, “You can be anything you want to be in America”? Sure. But, did he expect it to just happen? For his dreams to just come true? Probably not. Because, as we know from experience with these stories that these men and women seeking better lives here in America worked hard. We learned about it in elementary school. Later on in our education, we heard the horrible stories about the conditions they had to endure. But, endure they did. And we’re not talking about dirty bathrooms or cramped offices. These men and women actually had good reason to feel used, overworked and put in harms way. Yet, on they pressed. And for many, things got easier. They lived the dream. They worked within their abilities and now we, their kids and grandkids, are here – living better lives.
Did they have other unattainable dreams? Probably. But, they focused instead on living a better life, caring for their families and building a legacy.
So, how did we get to this place? Kids grow up being told they can be anything. College students graduate from school and turn down decent jobs in hopes of finding something more ‘deserving’ of their degrees. Career-focused adults put off having families or investing in others until they’ve achieved their loftiest goals. Many people go through life without knowing what they’re good at, working for a paycheck or for prestige instead of utilizing their talents and abilities.
Sounds problematic for society.
Now, let me rewind and address a few things. Do I think dreams are important? You know I do. Do I think they should be pursued? Sometimes. There’s this thing they don’t teach kids anymore – discernment. Discernment is more than knowing right from wrong. Discern and perceive are often used interchangeably. According to the dictionary, there are two separate ways to use the word discernment. The typical usage refers to sound judgement. The other, annotated for Christian contexts, describes perception beyond the ordinary, focused on seeking spiritual direction and understanding.
I know not everyone in America is religious. I understand, to the best of my abilities, the plight our nation is in due to spiritual dryness. So, I guess the rest of this blog entry will seem a little skewed to those who don’t share my beliefs.
The problem with the American dream as it exists today is it focuses almost entirely on our selfish desires (which encompass a need to work less and enjoy more) instead of seeking out God’s better plan for us.
According to C.S. Lewis, ‘There are only two kinds of people in the end: those who say to God, “Thy will be done,” and those to whom God says, in the end, “Thy will be done.”‘ (The Great Divorce)
So, we can choose. To adhere to the modern American dream, which is much more self-centered and self-indulgent than that of our predecessors, or to develop our gifts and trust the will of an all-knowing Creator.
Doesn’t seem like much of a choice to me.
You see, I think we all have it in us to continually improve ourselves. Not in order to climb the ladder of success or force our way into a career ill-suited for our giftings, though. I think we can surrender our lives, given to us by the Lord anyway, back to Him and enjoy the wild ride, or we can (because we have free will) try to force His hand and zero-in only on what we want out of life. It’s His will versus ours. And it’s a choice we have to make every day.
Wish you could pursue a career in music, but it’s not your gifting? Bummer. Come to terms with that. Take some time to feel a little sad if you need to. Then, get on your knees and pray about how to use your incredible talents in other ways, maybe even in ways related to the music industry.
Wanna be a doctor because of the paycheck, but you’re a terrible student? That’s probably not going to work for you. Rethink your priorities and try something else.
This is where discernment comes back into play.
If you don’t know your talents well, if you’ve been focused on trying to foster abilities you don’t have, you may need to reevaluate what you’re best at and spend some serious time in prayer. Then, once you have a purposeful direction, you can move forward toward success.
And guys (erm, and gals), we have to get past this idea that one gift is better than another. That one career is superior to the other. We know from Paul’s first letter to the church in Corinth that this was an issue even in the early days of Christianity:
“Now there are varieties of gifts, but the same Spirit. And there are varieties of ministries, and the same Lord. There are varieties of effects, but the same God who works all things in all persons. But to each one is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good. For to one is given the word of wisdom through the Spirit, and to another the word of knowledge according to the same Spirit; to another faith by the same Spirit, and to another gifts of healing by the one Spirit, and to another the effecting of miracles, and to another prophecy, and to another the distinguishing of spirits, to another various kinds of tongues, and to another the interpretation of tongues. But one and the same Spirit works all these things, distributing to each one individually just as He wills.” (1 Cor 12:4-11, NIV)
So you don’t have the gift you want? Ya, I get it. However, we were bought with a price and for that reason our lives are no longer ours. And, if we choose to be self-seeking and pursue the life we wish for instead of surrendering to the plan He has for us, we won’t be be happy either. And also – everything worth living for demands work from us. You work through school, work through your career, work through your relationships and even work through your hobbies. Work isn’t just essential. It’s a huge part of improving ourselves. Let’s stop being afraid to work hard.
Bottom line? Don’t not dream. That’s not my point. Don’t not make money, that’s not my intention either. But decide what kind of person you want to be: the one who trusts God’s will or chooses his/her own way. Use your gifts for His glory or for your own. Seek a path laid by Him or try to forge your own.
My opinion? Use discernment, develop your gifts, receive the gift of limits and thrive in the relationship (based on trust) you can have with your Creator. Throw in a lotta hard work and a little imagination, and who knows what you’re truly capable of 😉
Photos from IM Creator
So I haven’t posted a rambling blog in a while.
Because nobody’s got time for that.
Even though I really enjoy writing them. And I know someone enjoys reading them.
Life’s been a little crazy lately. Navigating the new business, managing day to day things, Justin becoming a pastor, becoming a pastor’s wife, helping with a church plant, working with awesome clients, figuring out our financial future (read this – saving for retirement!)…
And now, we have to buy a new (to us, at least) car.
Yep. I’m about to ramble about the loss of my husband’s beloved Camaro.
(A very pro, in-motion iPhone shot)
I’m not sure how we’ll get through this. And you think I’m kidding. This car is not a machine – it has a soul. His father bought it brand new in 1995 and it’s been in the family ever since. Justin’s driven it since he was 16. It’s been totaled, sideswiped, pranked, and repaired (a lot). It’s a part of one of his earliest memories. It’s also the car we went out on our first date in. It’s the car we drove around in when we were hunting for our first home. It’s the car we had our (very awkward) second kiss in.
Obviously not in that order. Rambling, remember? 😉
Anyway. This poor car. I’ve been the bad guy here – trying to get him to get rid of it for years. Ever since it was totaled back in 2009. But, I helped him salvage it anyway, finding mechanics to bring it back to life. We’ve put new tires on it, had the motors in the windows replaced, tried to manage damaged head gasket, put in a new stereo, had the passanger door replaced, put in a new catalytic converter…This could go on for quite some time.
Wanna know what totaled it?
A smog check.
No, seriously. If you’re reading this and do not live in California, you may not understand our frustration. Every vehicle in California must pass strict regulations in order to be re-registered as operational. And, if we lived in Nevada, just an hour away, we’d be smooth sailing. But, there’s a minor issue with the gas tank that keeps the Camaro from passing smog here in California. It wouldn’t be a big deal to fix, says our mechanic, but to get to the problem, well…it would cost about $500.
$500. That’s how much we’d get if we traded it in.
So, now that we put all this work into the car to get it in great shape, we can’t keep it. I guess it’s all worked out in a timely manor. We’re in need of a little more room anyway (read this – we’re not pregnant) – I’d love a compact SUV to fit our outdoorsy lifestyle. But, it sucks that it happened this way.
So, RIP you rumbling, white ‘Maro. I’ll miss hearing Justin come home from work in it. Hopefully we can find something worthy of you in the next chapter.
Late Night with Seth Meyers premieres on the 24th after the Olympics!
Are you staying up to watch it?
Seth really hopes you will:
With 12 years of SNL experience and a great, snarky sense of humor, Seth promises to be an awesome host to follow Jimmy Fallon.
Check out that logo:
And, Fred Armisen’s leading the Late Night band. Ya, he is!
When I talk to people today, I will remember to be kind and considerate. Because I don’t know if they’re relating more to the steer or the crystal in that moment.
And, I hope I’ll encounter a few other who think the same way 😉
Where have I been, you may be wondering?
Wow, it’s been crazy. In a really great, this-is-so-awesome-I-can’t-even-be-stressed-kind-of-really-great, way. Let me show you 🙂
New to my Etsy shop
Logo sketchups for a children’s ministry (excuse my lame screenshot)
Concept for a college ministry series (featuring a photo by Kaitlin Jean Photography)
Talk about a media dump.
But I don’t have time to talk. Busy, busy, busy!
You may be wondering why all of these very festive, very cray pictures are included with this post today…
“Are they dancing?”
“Some sort of interpretive movement convention?”
“Did that man just score some kind of touchdown?”
No, no, friends. He’s just really excited to sing The 12 Days of Christmas, with the aid of signs illustrated by yours truly.
Just thought I’d share 🙂
Is it just me, or does the gymnasium seem to glow with tidings of comfort and joy? Man, this photographer was amazing!
I saw this prompt on Facebook today (yes, I am Facebook friends with my college English professor 😉 )…
“I don’t know my story yet.”
I don’t. I mean, I haven’t made many permanent decisions in my short life.
I’m a boneified born-again Christian.
And I obviously got married.
But, I don’t have children (yikes), I never got around to getting a tattoo. I can’t even think of more unchangeable decisions I could make right now…
So, my point is, I don’t know how this story’s going to go.
I don’t know what’s coming up next.
And I don’t think that’s a bad thing. I actually think it’s pretty exciting. Things have turned out really, really well so far and I’m looking forward to whatever is next.
Not that life is never challenging. I’m one of those sensitive, over-analytical types. To me, most things are complicated. But my life continues to surprise me in ways I never could have planned myself.
Again, it’s not that it’s necessarily bad to have a plan for the future. As long as you’re flexible 😉
Think about it this way. The world around us is constantly changing. The opportunities available to our generation are unbelievable. We can work from multiple settings instead of just in an office or workspace. We can receive a world class education anywhere WiFi is available. We have smartphones, which act as personal assistants and help us organize our lives. And, we can even see movies in 48fps (frames per second) ;).
So, how could we truly comprehend the possibilities available to us?
I just saw the movie “Her”. Do I recommend it? Not particularly, It’s kinda weird and uncomfortable and you just know it can’t end well, ’cause this guy falls in love with his OS (operating system).
Ya. Weird and uncomfortable.
But it made me wonder. Is that coming? Not that that makes me feel excited for the future. That actually makes me worried. But I can’t even begin to understand where our world is headed!
If you’d asked me 6 years ago what I thought I’d be doing with my life, what I’m doing now would not have been my answer.
Graphic design and content creation? What did that even mean 6 years ago?
So I guess my bottom line here is: It’s ok to not know your story.
Have you ever heard how a movie ends and not wanted to see it anymore?
Btw – that happened to me recently – someone told me how this season of “The Walking Dead” ended. And now, I can’t bring myself to watch the rest of it. Be careful with your spoilers, people! 🙁
Knowledge is power, right? Right.
So, instead of freaking out about some subplot of your story that isn’t going the way you hoped (love-life, work, school, money, friends…), think about this – the best is the stuff that hasn’t happened yet.
And it isn’t always fun to know how things will end up. Talk about spoilers.
And like the OS, Samantha, said in tonight’s movie, “The past is just a story we tell ourselves.”
But we are living our present and have hope for the future.